Superior
by Ferociter
Summary: We were designed to be the best irken soldiers in the world. Even better than the invaders. For years we trained, and no one knew our purpose. Finally it was our chance. Our chance to prove ourselves. It was a simple job, get in, get out, return home. That was it. When everything fell to pieces, I have to wonder, did we have enough training?
1. Plot a Course for Earth

**Hey all! New Story. YAY! For all of you crazy worry-people, THIS IS NOT REPLACING MORE OF US. I know I just said in my last More Of Us chapter that I would be rewriting it, but right now I am looking for inspiration for it. It will come. In the meantime enjoy this story, which is going to get really crazy... I don't want rush it like I did with More Of Us and ruin it. ENJOY. (Oh, and you might notice the massive increase in word count. It's all about the details)**

**I almost forgot; please review! Bad reviews are great because they help me improve, and good reviews are good because I know what I'm doing right. Reviews are like fuel, more reviews more chapters.**

* * *

I glanced around me as I strutted past the _lesser _irkens. It was finally our time. The tallest had requested our presence. We would become the heroes of the irken empire, and everyone would know of our presence. The fact of the matter was, we were better and everyone would fear us. Even our fellow irkens.

"Is this it?" one of my team walked up beside me, her violet eyes glinted wickedly.

"Yes," I glanced over at her.

"Can you be sure?"

I looked down, the short distance to her eyes. She was short for her rank, but I would choose no one else. I've never met another irken that could handle a gun as well as her. Her antenna were long, reaching almost to her ankles, and had a sort of spirally triangle shape on the tips, almost as if someone had taken triangle antenna, and cut away in a spiral.

"Yes."

Another irken, nearly as tall as me, her right eye blazed a fearsome orange, and her left eye was a simple blue, walked up beside me. Our medic. She sported some serrated long triangles that jutted straight out.

"I just got the call. What is this about?"

The shorter irken piped up.

"Do I get to shoot something?"

"Relax. It's time."

"But... We never finished formal training," the medic looked at me skeptically.

"I-" The hissing of automatic doors cut me off, and Tallest Purple stepped out.

"Welcome!" he grinned maniacally.

"My tallest," I bowed.

"I see someone has maintained some respect," Tallest Purple glared at my colleagues.

"My liege..." the shorter irken bowed, moving her arms out slowly, a sarcastic tone in her voice.

The medic bent at her waist, only slightly.

"Uri, what an... _elegant _bow," I glared at the shorter irken.

"Please, there is no time for anger. I have some great news to share," Tallest Purple beckoned us inside.

I cautiously stepped inside. The room was small and dark, with only two chairs, centered in the room. One was facing towards the door and empty. The other was facing away, towards a window. Tallest Purple walked up a couple small stairs and seated himself in the vacant chair. The door hissed closed behind me. The chair facing away rotated and revealed Tallest Red, his hands linked together, and supporting his chin. Doubt filled my mind.

_"You have outlived your usefulness. You will soon be rotting."_

"Suni!"

I shook my head and looked up. Tallest Red had addressed me.

"Yes?"

Tallest Red sighed.

"I said, We have a mission for you. Do you except?"

I blinked my yellow eyes slowly, not quite processing what was going on. I yanked on one of my long-ish corkscrew antenna.

"Suni! Do you except your mission!"

"Yes sir!"

"Good. Follow me."

Tallest Red stood and walked to the wall. Lights turned on, revealing that the room wasn't so small. It opened into a large hanger. The walls were bent and covered in scorch marks. The breached chamber. I recognized this place from the stories told by the older irkens. The one time an enemy vessel had breached the Massive, it was into this hanger. The ship had crashed and the strange aliens inside had escaped. The irkens responded violently. Much blood was spilled. Then, when the battle was to be won, one of the enemy soldiers returned to the ship, and overloaded the engine, and killing every irken in the room. There had only been five soldiers on that vessel, and seventy eight irkens died.

Seated in the center of the hanger, was a sleek vessel, one I had never seen before.

"Do you like it?" Tallest Purple turned towards me.

"Yes... But- it doesn't appear irken," I looked up at my leader.

"It's not. We reverse engineered it based on the pieces we found after the explosion. Then we painted it to look like it belonged to us," Tallest Red glanced up at the craft.

My mouth opened in aw as we approached the vessel. The bottom was ever so slightly curved in, and the irken symbol sat proudly on the bottom. The ship had two strange winglets, that were laid back like the ears of an angry beast. The front was a slightly curved angle, leading into the top, which went straight back, and had a slightly more extreme upwards curve running the length of it. Near the front was a leg of some sort, that seemed unstable. It consisted of three joints. One at the top of the leg, one in the middle like a knee, and one where it met the foot. In the back there were two boosters, pointing towards the ground. The boosters had a cone on the opposite side from the rockets, that had yellow and black spirals on it. The boosters appeared to be hinged. The window at the front ran the width of the craft, and the sides were tilted in, making the bottom of the window shorter than the top. At the very front there were two headlights. The coloring was very similar to the Massive, except white across the bottom, boasting the irken symbol. There were three panels on the bottom, one that the leg was protruding from, and two more in front of that.

Something bounced off my head painfully, as I looked at the ship. I looked down at the ground and saw keys.

"She's yours," Tallest Red glanced at the keys on the floor.

I picked up the keys and looked back at the ship, rubbing my head. On second glance, the ship wasn't as large as I had originally thought. It was bigger than a cruiser, and smaller than a crew transport ship. It must be a fighter.

"What is she called?" I asked.

"Superior. Like you," Tallest Purple answered

"We modified the controls to be pilot-able with just one irken," Tallest Red glanced at me smugly.

"It's really ours?" Uri glanced at the Tallest, who were now standing side by side.

"Yes. The mission is coded into the on board computer. We wouldn't want to risk anyone overhearing it, now would we," Tallest Purple glanced to the entrance of the hanger.

I walked to the back, which slanted up into the top, creating a ledge above me, and pushed the button on the keys. A section of the back hissed and began to lower, forming a ramp into the space craft. I walked slowly up the ramp, and peered inside. There were exactly five chairs in the room. Three were at the front, looking out of the window, with a large dashboard in front of them. The dashboard was mostly plain, except for a joystick, three buttons to the right of the joystick, an second joystick, one that could only move forward and backward, to it's left. The floor was boring grey, and cables lined the ceiling. The walls were a slightly darker color than the floor. The other two chairs were on either side of the inside of the spacecraft, facing the walls. There were screens in front of the chairs, and a few controls. The screens on the right had diagrams of the spacecraft, which was broken up into segments. The segments were pale blue and had 100% inside of them. I assumed it meant the ship was completely undamaged. The main screen on the left was a radar, and the ones on either side of that were digital maps, of the galaxy we were in. The screen on top was a map of the known universe.

I walked to the front of the spacecraft, and sat in the middle chair. It was comfortable. Uri walked in and glanced around. She noticed a cupboard I had missed and opened it. The cupboard was filled with strange weapons I had not seen before. Uri grinned. Veira, the medic, walked in and immediately sat down at the damage indicator station. The door sealed behind her and interior lights flickered on. The window went black, and the Tallest's faces appeared on it. The window also functioned as a screen.

"Hello faithful members of the irken armada!" Tallest Red grinned.

"The controls are very basic. The left joystick controls speed, and also has the button to shoot the ships weapon. The right joystick steers. The buttons state what they do, and we don't really understand what the stuff at the other two stations does, but we're sure you'll figure it out," Tallest Purple matched Tallest Red's grin.

The screen closed and light flooded through the windows. I blinked once, then pulled on the coils in my right antenna. Just for luck. I pressed the button that was labeled _landing gear _in irken, and heard a soft hum as the leg retracted and the two boosters rotated into place. The ship remained in the air, by some sort of hovering system. I turned the ship towards the round door at the end of the hangar. I looked to my left, and saw the Tallest giving me the thumbs up from behind the safety glass. The doors rotated and pulled apart with a groan. I struggled to keep the ship in place as space sucked all the air out if the chamber. I pressed forward on the throttle. The ship slowly moved forward, and through the gap. I turned the ship and glanced back at the massive, as the eye on the irken symbol closed behind me.

I slowed the ship to a stop and rotated the chair so I was facing inward. The Tallest had said the computer would brief us. I waited patiently for another minute, then realized nothing was going to happen.

"Um, computer?"

"Yes sir," a robotic sounding woman's voice replied.

"You have our mission data?"

"Yes sir," The voice replied.

"Could you play it?"

"Initiating playback."

A small panel opened in the floor and a metal box with a topless cone rises from the hole. The topless cone lit up and a spherical hologram appeared above it. For a minute nothing happened, then the computer's voice spoke up.

"Your Target-" The sphere changed and became a figure.

"Invader Zim-" The figure blurred, then sharpened, and a Zim hologram started spinning, allowing us all to see him.

Information appeared on his right side, and on the left side, random clips of him destroying our cities in the battle mech.

"Rank- Invader, Status- Gullible, Reason for termination- Annoying."

I squinted my eyes at the hologram, just spinning.

"Location- Earth."

"Hmm. He looks fairly harmless," Uri raised an eyebrow.

"Computer, threat level?" I asked.

"Threat level- High."

"Computer, details. Besides the obvious reasons," I waved at the clips, and they disappeared.

"Suspected of rogue behavior. Suspected of insanity."

"Specify rogue behavior," Veira commanded.

"Has severed contact with The Tallest. Has been filmed fraternizing with humans. Has repainted his space craft, The Voot."

"Computer, pull up information on the cruiser model, Voot."

"Searching..."

The holo-Zim was replaced by a holographic Voot Cruiser.

"Weapons- Features two pulse cannons that also function as tractor beams. Tools- Features two pods that detach and form cutting tools. Status- Outdated."

"Should be fairly easy to take out. Computer, identify weak points. Color- Red," I leaned forward as the red began to color the space craft.

The boosters turned red, along with the glass cockpit and the very back of the Voot.

"Computer, save data," I turned around in my chair, and grabbed the joystick and throttle again.

The box lowered into the floor, and the panel sealed over it again.

"Data saved."

"Uri, plot a course for Earth."

"Yes sir!"

She bent forward and started pushing buttons. A second later she straightened up.

"Course set sir!"

I threw the throttle up and we left the armada for the first time.

* * *

Four Hours Later...

"Sir, how far away is Earth?" Uri turned her head and looked at me.

We were a sorry sight. Uri had her feet up on the navigation control panel, and Veira had fallen asleep and was drooling on herself, and I kept yanking on my antenna to stay awake.

"Uri, I don't know. We'll get there, when we get there."

Uri rolled her head back and looked at the ceiling.

"Computer, how much longer until we arrive at Earth?"

"The trip can take anywhere between eight months and 0.14 seconds."

"Oh- Wait, what!?"

"Allow me to repeat myself- The trip can take anywhere between eight months and 0.14 seconds. Was that not clear before?"

"How would we get there in 0.14 seconds?" I sat up and spun around.

"Use the hyper drive, sir."

"The what now?"

"The hyper drive."

"That does what?"

"It folds the corners of space and let's you jump between them."

Uri sat up.

"Let's do that!"

"Computer, how do you activate hyper drive?"

"Say, Computer, activate hyper drive. However hyper drive requires certain precautio-"

"Computer, activate hyper drive!" Uri yelled.

Everything blurred and stretched out, and I was vaguely aware of Veira flying out of her chair and into the back of the Superior. As soon as it started, it stopped.

"Ow."

"Oops," Uri looked at me awkwardly.

"That's the understatement of the century."

A groan sounded from behind me.

"Shit. You killed our medic," I got up an ran to the back of the Superior.

Veira was slumped, her head sagged forward, and her eyes were closed. Uri appeared behind me.

"We need to take her to an irken medical facility!" I glared at Uri.

"Got it. Computer, where are we?" Uri looked up.

"We are currently orbiting Pluto, a dwarf planet in Earth's solar system."

"And the nearest irken medical facility?"

"Our last location."

"Can we hyper drive back?"

"Under normal circumstances, the hyper drive would need time to recharge."

Uri got a hopeful look.

"And under these circumstances?"

"The hyper drive was poorly assembled and was completely fried in the travel."

"Oh."

I pulled Veira out into the center of the floor and laid her down.

"Uri, come here and keep Veira's head elevated."

"What are you going to do?"

"Take us to Earth."

I sat down in my chair, and throttled the Superior up. Worry lined my forehead as I left Pluto behind. How could my first mission go so badly?

* * *

Later

I frowned as I looked out the window at the planet below us. I glanced back at Uri, who was trying to awaken Veira by murmuring in her ear. I had put the Superior into Earth's orbit while I looked for a safe place to land. I couldn't reveal the irken's existence to humans. I squinted.

"Computer, zoom."

The window appeared to fly forward as it zoned in on the location. It was a forest, one with little human habitation. The best I had seen so far. I masterfully turned the joystick and scored the forest. I located a small clearing, with a cave. It was perfect. Secluded, flat, and it had a place to set up our base. I sat down.

"Uri, are you stable?"

"Yes."

"Good, I'm taking us down."

I flew down into earth's atmosphere, carefully bring us in slowly. We passed through and the cockpit began to heat up.

"Hold on Uri."

I pushed the joystick all the way forward, and the Superior went into a dive. I gritted my teeth as I was pushed back into my seat.

"Warning G-force levels above recommended value."

"Shut up!"

The Superior punched through the cloud layer, and the ground appeared. Much closer than I thought it would be. I pulled back on the joystick, and the Superior responded, pulling up and flying just above the tree line.

"Excuse, but can we not-" Uri called from the back.

"Sorry. But I think we need to get her into normal gravity as soon as possible."

"This is why we can't have nice things," Uri said, sarcastically.

I shook my head and turned my eyes back to the window. I saw the clearing ahead and adjusted our course. Once we were above the clearing I pressed the landing gear button, and we began to descend. We hit the ground with a soft bump.

"Uh, Suni?"

"Yeah Uri?"

"Veira is bleeding."

"What?"

"Yeah. I guess we didn't notice it before because we were in space."

"Shit."

"We need to get her on a stretcher."

I stood up and walked to the cupboard opposite the weapons cupboard. I opened it and saw it was filled with tiny cubes. I grinned.

"We have supply cubes."

"Great," Uri stared at me, "That was sarcastic."

"I know. Catch," I threw a cube at Uri's head.

"Owww," Uri jokingly whined.

"Just- just activate the stretcher," I glared at her, aggravated.

Uri picked up the cube and pushed one of the sides. The cube started to blink red. She put the cube down on the ground and backed away. A hissing sound filled the Superior, and the cube unfolded, until it became a hover stretcher.

"Help me put Veira on."

Uri and I struggled as we lifted Veira onto the stretcher. We dropped her mercilessly onto it, in an unorganized heap. I pushed the stretcher to the door.

"Computer, open door."

The door hissed and lowered. I ran out, pushing the stretcher. The cold wet grass crunched under my foot. There was a short cliff to my right, and in the cliff was a small hole. The cave. I turned and walked towards the hole. It was smaller than I had thought. I ducked and walked inside. The entrance was bigger on the other side. I turned around and grabbed the stretcher, gingerly pulling it inside. The cave dipped down at a steep angle. I carefully made my way down the hill. I could vaguely make out a faint glow around a bend. I stepped around the bend and my eyes grew wide.

There were colorful gems sprouting from the ceiling, which pulsed with a strange glow. They completely lit up the cave, which had a floor that was unusually flat, except for a dip into the back, which held some kind of clear liquid. I slipped on the ground and fell onto the stretcher. I shot across the room and the stretcher went over the dip and stopped over the strange liquid.

"Uri."

"Yes," Uri came around the bend and looked at the ceiling in aw.

"Do you recognize this liquid?"

Uri looked at the liquid the hover stretcher was now lowering towards. I scrambled onto the stretcher, squishing Veira.

"No. I can't say as I do."

"Please ask the computer."

"Will do."

Uri turned and started running back out of the cave.

"Uri! I meant af-"

She disappeared from sight.

"-ter you pull me back to safety."

I grimaced as the stretcher dropped another couple of inches.

"Uri!" I got no answer.

The stretcher dropped again, so that the fabric that made up the bottom was wet with the liquid. I scrambled further onto Veira. She grunted. Uri ran in, looking terrified.

"Based on my description, the computer told me it's water! Apparently it's so polluted that it is like acid to irken skin!"

"Um, Uri..."

I looked down as the stretcher started to shake.

"Yeah?" Uri said as the stretcher gave out and I collapsed into the water with a splash.

I grimaced and stood. The water was only waist deep, and didn't appear to be eating away at my skin.

"Check the pollutant levels in this water Uri."

"WAGUBLUGHATHUG!" Veira stood up behind me, and started spitting water everywhere.

"Oh. Veira, your alive," I looked behind me.

"Mostly. My head hurts like crazy though."

"Yeah, it's a little bit bleeding and traumatized."

"What happ-"

"Don't even ask me. Just get the computer to show you the flight footage," I walked out of the water, shaking my head slightly to get the water off of my antenna.

Uri came running in, leaned over the water, and took a small sample of it. Veira walked out, rubbing her head.

"Hey Uri, where's the exit. And the ship." Veira looked at Uri as she passed

"Why don't you ask Suni?" Uri looked up from her sample.

"He's a little grouchy."

"I don't blame him-"

I stopped listening as I walked over to the opposite side of the cavern, and stripped my shirt off. I sat down on a ledge, and threw the shirt to the ground. My neck slackened and my head fell into my hands. I closed my eyes, and forced all thought from my mind. I squinted harder as the anger flushed from my system. It was difficult, because it had been a while since I used this method. I used it a lot in training, before I stopped caring about the people I killed.

A few minutes passed, while my teammates began to unload the ship. Neither of them disturbed me. Finally I stood up, and dropped my arms to my sides. They sagged from exhaustion. I shook me head, then stepped forward, strong and bold.

"Uri!" I barked.

"Yessir," Uri came running from the other side of the cavern.

"I need my EPT. Stat."

"Your what-now?" Uri looked at me strangely.

"My EPT, or Electrical Placement Tape," I glared down at her.

"Ok... I think... I saw it. Over there?" Uri spun around in place.

"Uri."

"Yes Suni?"

"First off, you are to address me as captain, or sir. Secondly, what have I told you about not losing important equipment?" I stepped around Uri, so that she was behind me, facing the wall.

"Definitely, always do it."

I sighed.

"Back in training, you would have been heavily disciplined for this behavior. As it is, I have not the time, so I shall let you off with a warning. Mind your attitude, or I will hang you from the ceiling by your _antenna!_" I seethed the last few words.

Uri gulped.

I walked out into the center of the cavern.

"Now Uri. Bring me my EPT. If you fail to comply, you know what happens."

Uri ran around me and started searching through boxes, frantically. A huge grin split across my face. I loved it when I made someone cringe.

* * *

I straightened my back, and looked at my handiwork. The floor of the cave was divided by lines of glowing tape. One side had a row of squares marked out, and the other had a similar set of squares, except these were staggered so each side of the square, met the middle of the square across from it. There were four squares on the right, and three on the left. Each square had a supply cube in the middle. I pushed the button attached to my tape, and each cube activated. The one closest to me, on the right, shot across and unfolded into cryo-pods, their backs pressed tightly against the cave wall. The second one on the right, unfolded into an irken kitchen. The one behind that unfolded into a weapons lab. The final one on the right shaped into a power converter, which ran it's cords to everywhere else. The first one on the left opened up and became an engineering lab. The one behind that became the medical lab, and the final one became a laundry room. I grimaced as I looked at my shirt, filthy and laying on the dirt covered ground. We really needed a floor.

I stepped back and admired my handiwork. We didn't need lights because of the strange crystals, so that saved power. I walked to the pool of water.

"Uri, what came back in the test?"

"Um... rounding it was- 96% pure water- 3% natural minerals- 0.00000000000000000006% irken blood."

"Good."

I tossed one last cube into the water. It started blinking, then sank below the water. A heavy cable shot out of the water and plugged into the power converter. The soft sound of machines humming filled the air.

"We got lucky. I didn't think the cave would have a source of natural coolant. The generator should be just fine," I smiled at my crew.

"Now we go hunting."

"Now we go hunting," I agreed.


	2. Dib's Nightmare

**Changes since last chapter: Names, Pyk is now called Suni, Wik is called Veira, and Vex is called Uri**

**Hello again! I hope you enjoy the chapter. Not to be a spoiler, buuuut, *This section has been censored for major spoilers***

**Huh? What... Oh well. So, anyway, I was going to try my hand at doing someone else P.O.V... I was thinking Uri, because this is the chapter where *This section has been censored for major spoilers***

**Again?... Huh... Well, I guess if you want to find out you'll have to actually brave my writing, and read it. Before we begin though, I noticed an immense lack of reviews on the last chapter. I'm a busy procrastinator you know! I'm busy... procrastinating! So if I don't get reviews, there is nothing making me write this (besides my love of writing). So there!**

* * *

**P.O.V - Uri**

I leaned back against the pointy rock, staring up into the blue sky. I had traded my usual uniform for one without sleeves, in an attempt to beat the heat. Our 'fearless' leader had kept us out in the sun for hours. Veira was fanning herself, and sitting under the shade of a tree, a couple feet away. Suni was sitting to my left, facing the opposite direction as me, leaning into a scraggly bush.

"Sir, if I may object-" I began.

"You may not object! After the awful day yesterday, what with you almost killing our medic, and ruining our fastest way home, I have decided we need to locate, and dispose of Zim as soon as possible! Do you understand that Uri?"

I shrugged, not understanding what his problem was. I only broke the ship and gave our medic a head wound. In my book, any day I get blood on my hands is a good day. I wiped sweat off my forehead, and glanced over at Suni.

"What makes you think Zim is here?"

"I don't. But, Zim has reported many attacks by a human. This human must know his location."

"So, we ally with this human? A lesser being?"

"No. We get this human to talk, then, _dispose _of it."

I rolled over so I was next to Suni. He withdrew his head from the bush.

"Now we're talking!" I grinned.

"Good, because it's your turn to watch the primitive Earth vehicles drive by."

"Um... what?"

"I've been staring through the viewing glasses for hours. I need a break. That's an order," Suni looked at me, and handed me the viewing glasses.

"Grrrrrr," I growled at him.

He handed me the viewing glasses anyway.

"Fine."

I stuck my head into the bush and raised the viewing glasses to my eyes. They closely resembled the human binoculars. Except they weren't primitive.

"What am I looking for anyway?"

"A... human."

I raised my eyebrow.

"In that case, there's one, and there's another one, and another one."

"Don't be a smart-ass."

"Could you be more specific, than 'a human'?"

Suni sighed and rubbed his temples, "The human spends most of his time in a building called 'Skool'. It's a place of education... I think."

"Yeah, I see the building."

"That's why I chose this spot," Suni said.

I rolled my eyes, and focused the lenses on the door. Then I waited. I was vaguely aware of Veira lecturing Suni about how the UV rays were dangerous and could cause burns.

"I'm just saying, it would be better for your health if you put a shirt on," She babbled.

"Then I will die from the heat!" Suni raised his voice.

"If you didn't have us out here on this pointless mission-"

"You think the mission given to us by the Tallest is _pointless!"_ Suni was yelling now.

"No! But this meaningless chore! Sitting out here for hours, doing nothing!"

"We are carrying out the mighty Tallest's whishes! What we were made to do! Finding Zim is our top priority!"

"Then track his ship! We have the means!" I heard Veira stomp her foot.

"We can't! The Tallest locked the capabilities to track anything! They want to see what we're capable of!"

"Then show them we can unlock them!"

"That is not what they want from us! Remember this is our first mission, our first field job! We have trained longer than any Irken, and if we can't find a crazy son-of-a-metal-arm, then what good are we?"

"How can we prove ourselves if we are too burned to move? How can our leader lead us, if he can't fly the ship?"

"Not this again..."

"For the last time, it is my medical opinion that it is in our best interest that you but your shirt back on."

"Shut up!" I screamed.

"No Uri, we're _talking,_" I felt Suni glare at me.

"No, _look!_" I turned back and gazed through the viewing glasses.

A loud bell had sounded and humans were flooding from the building. Suni walked up behind me, and laid down in the bush.

"Mind if I have a look?" Suni reached for the viewing glasses.

I handed them over, and turned back towards the black specks seeping from the building.

"They're everywhere. Like filthy flies, feasting on rotting meat," Suni shook his head and scrolled the wheel to zoom in.

"Do you see him?" I look over at Suni.

"Can't be... sure. Veira! Bring me the hologram!"

Veira crawled into the bush on the opposite side of me and pulled out a small disc. She placed the disc on the ground and pushed a button on the side. An image flickered up, first static. It gradually became clearer, until a three-d model was hovering in front of me. The figure was wearing a black jacket, open in the front. Underneath it was wearing a blue shirt with an indifferent face on it. Sitting on top of it's head was a scythe-like chunk of hair. He had round glasses. His arms were crossed behind his back.

"What is that?" I looked over at Veira.

To my surprise it was another voice that answered.

"The figure is Dib-man. A human male with a profession of paranormal investigation. According to target-Zim he poses little threat," The ship's computer responded.

"WHAT THE HELL!" I jumped back and rolled out of the bush.

Both Suni and Veira looked at the disc in shock.

"Computer? How are you speaking?" Suni looked quizzically at the disc.

"My hardrive is tiny compared to most Irken technology. As such I have been implemented into the mobile holographic unit."

"Oh," Suni lost the surprised look, and glared back through the viewing glasses.

I crawled back into the bush and pushed the button again. The hologram disappeared. I handed the disk to Suni and he slid it into a slit on the top of the viewing glasses. He started scanning the crowds. Every few seconds an annoying beep would sound.

After a while Suni started muttering to himself.

"No... no... nope... no... no, no, no... nope."

"Wait- no..."

"Suni, you're talking to yourself. It's really annoying with the beeping as well," I jabbed my fingers into Suni's side.

Suni ignored me.

"Nope... not him... maybe..."

I rolled my eyes.

"75% positive match. It's him."

"Finally," I crawled out of the bush, and stared down at the speck that was moving slowly across the sidewalk.

I backed up and ran towards the pointy rock. At the last second I jumped up and put my hand on the rock, and vaulted over it. My back was facing the hill, but I kept spinning and landed on my feet. The earth-dirt was loose and I started sliding down the hill, the dust kicking up and coating my legs in a thin brown layer. Two swooping shadows darkened the ground as Suni and Veira jumped after me. I leaned forward and picked up speed. As I got closer to the bottom, the Dib-man's figure became more important. He was walking into an alley, presumably taking a short cut. There was a package under his arm. I reached the bottom of the hill and rolled, coming up on my feet less then an inch from the road. I grinned in the second I was stopped and used my remaining momentum to push off the sidewalk. A human vehicle flew under me, then another, and another. I put up my hands and the hit the roof of a human vehicle and flew off the top, safely landing on my feet on the other side of the road. I glanced behind me at Suni and Veira who just came to their feet at the base of the hill. I grinned, and turned to the alley. The Dib-man was almost out of sight again.

"Damn. He's fast."

I started sprinting down the alley, occasionally leaping over a small piece of garbage. I thought my footsteps were loud in my Irken boots. So did Dib-man. He whirled around, the package tightly grasped in his human hands. I reached down and pulled a pistol from it's holster. The pistol had a large cylindrical barrel with six holes on either side, three in the middle, and two above and below that. The body of the gun had three long oval holes running along the lower side. Protruding from the back of the body was a large fin. Dib-man saw the weapon and dived behind a metal dumpster, dropping his package. I leapt up and planted a foot firmly on the wall. I stared down at Dib-man as I soared into the air. I pulled the trigger. A strange blue, almost liquid material flew out of the pistol, straight into his shoulder. He screamed and flew back, laying flat on the ground. I landed on top of the dumpster with a loud clang.

"Hey Dib-man."

Dib-man rolled over and started to crawl away.

"Dib-man, it's impolite to ignore a lady when she talks to you," I grinned down at the human, and holstered my weapon.

He kept crawling, and my confident grin drooped and I glared down at him.

"Hello Dib-man. We need to talk," I sneered.

The human kept crawling. I looked up from him and saw the package he had been carrying. Suddenly Dib-man jumped up and grabbed the package. I saw a flash of something shiny as the brown cloth was torn open, and a pile of black clothes fell out. I looked at the clothes, then raised my eyes to Dib-man. My eyes were met with the barrel of a primitive Earth gun. A shiny silver revolver was pointed straight in-between my eyes. I was too far to knock it from his hand, and too close to dive for cover.

"Dib-man... there is no need for this, I just want to talk," I put on a fake smile.

"I hereby place you under arrest for attacking a United Galactic Federation officer, and representative of Earth!"

I took a moment to stare at Dib-man quizzically. I noticed he was just a little bit taller than me, which pissed me off. He was dressed virtually the same as his hologram except his black jacket was sleeveless, and he was wearing some sort of sleeveless button up shirt underneath it. He was also wearing some sort of combat boots. His hair was very short, down to less than an inch thick, but the scythe blade was longer, going down to his lower back.

"Dib-man, you don't seem the same as our profile of you."

"I'm sure you irkens have heard of aging."

I blinked, surprised by his comment.

"You ever used a gun before Dib-man?"

"Yes. And the name is Dib!"

A loud yelp was heard near the entrance of the alley. Dib looked up and I ran towards him. He turned back and fired a shot. It missed my head and slammed into my lower arm. I put my head down and ran full force into his stomach. He grunted and dropped to the ground, dropping his gun. I scooped his revolver off the ground and planted my foot firmly on his back. I pulled out my own pistol and trained both on his head.

"Move and I blow your frikken brains out."

I relaxed a little as Suni and Veira walked up behind me.

"Thanks for the distraction."

"What distraction?"

"The... yelp?"

"Yeah... that wasn't... intentional, I kinda tripped on a piece of garbage," Veira said sheepishly.

"Suni?"

"Yes Uri?"

"Getting shot freakin hurts."

* * *

Back at Base

I leaned against the cold metal wall, my muscles tensing as it touched, even through the fabric of my shirt. I looked around at the dark room. In the center sat a large table. The top was made of white glass, and the body was made of metal. It stood on one leg in the center. On the far wall sat a large locker. It contained all the weapons I found onboard the ship. On the wall to my left, an almost unnoticeable three piece door sat closed. To the opposite side was another table, pressed against the wall. It was strewn with tools. Next to the tools were two glass cylinders, attached to the table. A button sat on the edge of the table, an equal distance between the two cylinders. I admired the newly installed walls in the cave. The outside hall finally had a floor and all the rooms had doors. I looked down at my wounded arm and finished wrapping the bandage around my wound. The bandage turned a darker color as the blood was absorbed into the fabric. Veira had done surgery and removed the bullet. I opened my hand and looked at the bloody metal object in my hand. The door hissed open and light flooded the room. A shadow fell across me as Suni walked into the room, carrying a large cardboard box.

"It's dark in here."

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to turn on the light?"

"No. It helps me ignore the pain."

"Okay..." Suni looked worriedly at me, his face in shadow from the light in the door.

"So, what do you want?"

"I wanted to congratulate you on catching the target. I know Veira and I can be a little... slow."

I chuckled under my breath.

"What's in the box?"

"The prisoners personal items, clothing, weapon, some earth candies. That kind of stuff."

"His clothes? What's he wearing?"

"At the moment, nothing."

"What?"

"Veira has had him in the medical bay for interrogation for a while now. He hasn't been responding. Veira's getting ready to go ballistic on him."

"I'm glad I'm not in his position."

"Ditto."

"So where are you going with the box?"

"Here, I need you to go through it."

"Ok," I reached forward to grab the box.

Suni dodged me and put the box onto the table.

"I don't want you to strain your arm."

"It's a box of cloth, how heavy could it be?"

"Just to be safe."

I grunted angrily.

"Speaking of interrogation, have you seen Veira's pear?"

"Her what?"

"Her fully automatic, spiked, electrically heated, model Z pear."

"What's that?"

"It's a torture device that goes..." Suni made a motion.

"Oh... Ewww."

"So have you seen it?"

"Something that gross, check the crates..."

"Ok..."

Suni walked to the doorway and turned left, disappearing behind the wall.

The door closed. I blinked as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. I walked towards the table and grabbed the box.

"Aaaah," My arm screamed out in pain, and I dropped the box.

"Shit!"

"Is everything alright Uri?" I jumped back as the computers voice came from a nearby speaker.

"Crap! You scared me!"

"Oh."

A pair of metal arms came out of the ceiling, righted the box, and scooped the contents back into it.

"Thanks Computer."

The computer did not respond.

"Computer, chair."

A hole opened in the ceiling and a chair dropped from the ceiling, next to the center table. It was attached to the ceiling by a hydraulic pole that connected to the back of the chair. It had a nice rounded design. I walked to the table, and slumped into the chair. I leaned forward and grabbed the box. I dragged it along the floor until it was next to the chair.

"Alright, let's see what we have here," I pulled a piece of thick black fabric from the box.

I laid it out on the table. It was Dib's sleeveless jacket. I pushed a button on the table and it lit up, casting an eerie glow around the room. I ran my finger across the now lighter jacket, seeking out the shadows in the fabric. I ran my fingers over the breast pocket and felt a cold bump. I reached into the pocket to grab the object, but felt nothing but fabric.

"What..."

I reached inside the coat and ran my fingers along the inside. I still felt the object but it wasn't there either. I stood up and walked the jacket to the other table. I sat down at the chair already there. I grabbed a knife off the table and slit open the fabric. A small metal shield shaped object fell out of the jacket onto the table.

"What have we here Dib? What are you hiding?" I grabbed the shield and walked back to the lighted table.

I sat back in the hanging chair and examined the metal shield. I ran my fingers along the symbol, boldly embossed on the front in a calm blue, standing out against the silver background. The symbol looked kinda' like a W with some other shape in the upside down V part of the W. I ran my fingers down the side of the badge, looking for any buttons or a switch of some kind. I pushed down on the W shape and the shield swung open. Inside there was a small delta shaped screen and a single button sitting in the curve of the delta screen. I put the device on the table and stood.

"Computer, door."

There was a long pause, then the door hissed open. I walked out of the room and heard the door hiss close behind me.

* * *

"Are you sure you it was a communicator?"

"Yes Suni, I'm sure."

"_Captain..._"

"Right, Captain. Yes, I'm sure."

"Was it a human 'cellphone'."

"No. It was alien in design. I think we may have scratched something much larger then we anticipated."

"We can't worry about-" Suni was cut off by a scream.

"Do we really have to talk here?" I glanced at the window into the medical bay.

Dib rolled off the table and fell to the ground, and tried to crawl away. Veira grabbed him by his shoulders and threw him back onto the table. I looked away as he started screaming again.

"I want to be here when he starts talking," Suni motioned at the window.

"Suni, I think we should be worried."

"About the communicator? Trust me, I have way too much on my plate right now..."

"I thought you said the mission was simple. Easy, get in, get out."

"Yes, and we've already screwed up. Veira almost died, we have no way back home, because the ship is alien to me, and I have no idea how to repair the hyper drive, and I can't with confidence say that the damage to the hyper drive will not effect basic ship functionality," Suni's shoulders slumped.

I cocked my head worriedly at Suni.

"We'll be fine. After all the training we have had, how could we not be fine," I smiled reassuringly and put my good hand on his shoulder.

Suni pushed it off and straightened his back and shoulders.

"Everything's fine Uri. Why wouldn't it be?"

I smiled.

"Now get back to work, or I'll push you to the ground and make you eat dirt," Suni glared at me.

"Yessir!" I turned around and walked as calmly as I could back to the weapons lab.

"Is something wrong Uri- You look distressed," The computer's voice filled my ears as the door closed behind me.

"Nothing's wrong computer. Nothing."

"Don't lie to me Uri-" the computer sounded angry.

"Computer, run diagnostics. You're acting funny."

"Yes master."

The computer sounded a little creepy.

I walked over to the chair, and slumped into it.

"Suni... you didn't used to be like this... Maybe-" I cut myself off, knowing my next words would be treason.

I reached down into the box, pushing the cloth to the side and seizing Dib's revolver.

"According to your file, you upgrade weapons to calm your nerves. Is that what you are doing now?"

"Why have you been going through my file, computer?"

"..."

"Computer?" I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

"I... am programmed with all of your files."

I looked down at the revolver.

"Oookayyy. Yes, I am upgrading a weapon. Bring me tools."

The table against the far wall slid out from the wall, leaving behind the two cylinders of glass attached to the wall and connected to the center table. I grabbed a handful of tools and pulled out my alien pistol.

* * *

After Hours of Work

I sat back and admired my handiwork. On the table in front of me sat a jumble of random parts, and a completed revolving weapon. The blaster in front of me was comprised from parts both from the original blaster and the revolver. I had used the barrel of the blaster with the hilt and body of the revolver, after attaching metal to the outside of both the body and hilt of the revolver to make them larger. I also connected a chunk of metal to the top of the revolver body into the small barrel between the body and the large barrel to connect the revolver and the blaster barrel. The inside of the cylinder had been replaced with the 'plasma' generator from the blaster. It was the first time I had heard of plasma blasters. Playing with new toys is always fun. The entire thing had been painted gunmetal grey. I picked up my gun and followed the tool table back to the wall.

"Computer, open tool-clone."

An almost invisible door of glass clicked and swung open. I put the pistol inside and let go. It hovered there as I closed the door. I sat back and pushed the red button on the table. Two metal cylinders popped out of the table, hiding the glass cylinders from sight. The door hissed open behind me.

"Uri, he talked."

* * *

I pulled the grey shirt over my head, readjusting the uncomfortable tight fabric around my body. The back of the shirt tapered out into long coattails, ending at my ankles. It had a short popped color, and no sleeves. I was wearing loose-ish dark green cargo pants. They contrasted the skin-tight shirt with their dimension. I buckled the belt, once it was connected looking like part of the fabric. I finished lacing up my combat boots as the door hissed open behind me.

"Are you ready?" Suni walked in.

He was wearing a similar shirt, designed for a male irken, except the front buttoned up like a trench coat and with sleeves, with white pants, a singular black stripe running down the front of his left leg. His boots were short, and had a small spike on the back of the neck of the boots.

"Almost. I've got a little something in the works."

"Ok."

Suni walked out and the door closed behind him. I walked towards the two cylinders, and pushed the red button, which was now flashing green. The metal cylinders slid down, revealing two of my modified pistols, one in each chamber. I opened the cylinders and grabbed the guns, slipping into my X shaped harness and putting the guns into the holsters near my waist. I grabbed a attachable sight off the table and exited the base.

Upon stepping outside I heard the roar of engines as the Superior hovered three feet off the ground. Veira was passing Suni crates from the ground. She was dressed in an identical shirt to mine, except the coattails were longer, and it was pure white. Her pants were also skin-tight and black. She was wearing hiking boots.

"You ready now Uri!" Suni shouted over the sound of the engines.

"Yes sir!"

I ran up to the open bay door of the ship and jumped, rolling onto the ships floor. Suni put down his hand and grabbed Veira's arm, pulling her onto the ship. He turned around and we all took to our stations.

"Where to Captain?" I yelled from the navigation panel as the bay doors closed.

"To Zim!"


End file.
